It is, of course, your American duty to have already made up your mind about who should be president, and by now firmly closed it. The only ones still on the fence are the magpies. So we won’t tout New York magazine’s Electopedia 2008 it terms of its usefulness, thank God. We won’t argue that its tidily arranged breakdown of candidate facts, from information you ought to know about the three contenders (Most Egregious Flip-Flop, Never-Altered Core Position, Greatest Private-Sector Liability) to stuff you just want to know (Best Debate Smackdown, Most Spectacular Source of Income) will aid you in the commission of democracy. We won’t even propose it as a source of quick-rebuttal info next the the family gets together and your dad gets on your case about supporting a communist (or maybe that’s just me).

No, we’ll merely suggest it as a form of surprisingly nutritious brain-snacking — like improbably tasty granola bites you can’t stop popping. McCain caught right-wing crap for his Wedding Crashers cameo! Obama gets a weekly trim at the Hyde Park Hair Barber Studio! Hillary is worth an estimated $34.9 million! We could consume this junk all day.