Who knows, maybe U.S. Sen. John Ensign felt bad for voting against a minimum wage increase. Maybe, during his daily 30-minute "thinking time" (?!) he realized he was being a dick for standing in the way of people working full-time yet making $10,712 per year. Maybe on his daily five-mile jog he realized that the Las Vegas Gleaner was right: It’s wrong to oppose increasing the minimum wage such that a person still couldn’t make enough in a year to afford a membership at the golf course where he regularly posts pretty good scores.

But Ensign sure backtracked today, putting out a news release that heralded his voting in favor of a minimum wage. And we at Various Things & Stuff think that’s just great…

Oh, wait. Ensign only voted for the minimum wage increase with "much-needed tax relief for the small businesses that keep our economy strong. Simply put, without the tax-relief offset many small businesses would have to lay off workers to pay for this minimum wage increase."

Yeah, we used to think that, too, until studies proved us wrong. We also used to believe in the Loch Ness Monster until it turned out that photo was all faked. Stupid photo fakers.

Anyway, Ensign took a couple shots at the Democrats in his release, and then probably went home to the mysterious religious commune where he lives in Washington, D.C. to shower because he felt so dirty about raising the minimum wage, even with the tax breaks. But hey, we’ll take what we can from the GOP.

Now let’s let Ensign return to the business at hand: Worrying that something he says might make a U.S. solider in Iraq — threatened by enemy gunfire, IEDs, inadequate armor and multiple deployments — feel bad. Oh, and maintaining that super-low golf handicap.

» It seems some members of the African American community feel that Gov. Jim Gibbons may not care about them. That assumes that Gibbons actually knows they’re African Americans, and not, say, Turks or something.

"He [Gibbons] has a Hispanic base, but there is a whole different voting bloc of African American descent, and I truly hope he has an agenda to help build that bridge," says Cordell Stokes, president of the Congress of African American Nevadans. "I am anticipating, because of his desire of claiming to have one Nevada, then he will take strides impacting the African American community."

(Side note: Stokes worked as a paid consultant to state Sen. Dina Titus, who lost to Gibbons in November.)

But the governor says he’s not ignoring anybody.

"My door is always open, unquestionably accessible to any group," he says. The problem is, once you get in the door, you’re assaulted by a barrage of words mostly including "innovative solutions," "creative solutions," "come together" "look at things differently" and "one Nevada," until finally your time is up and the next group is ushered in for its barrage.

Trust us, African Americans. There are worse things than not having a dialogue with the governor.

» Quotable: "Fatherland, socialism or death! We will prevail!" — Venezuelan National Assembly President Cilia Flores, after that body gave President Hugo Chavez broad authority to implement his socialist agenda without having to go through the legislature.

OK, so what are the choices again? Is that "Fatherland" AND "socialism" OR "death"? Or could we maybe do the Fatherland without the socialism, and hold the death?