Wait, you mean to tell us that Tessa Hafen bought a home in the 3rd Congressional District, just to run for Congress! Why, we’re outraged! What kind of a person would pick up from where he or she lived and move into a new home, just so they could be eligible to run for Congress?

How about U.S. Rep. Jon Porter? Yes, the same guy who’s got a new attack ad aimed at Hafen, saying she moved to Nevada just to run for Congress. (In truth, she grew up and went to high school here, but lived in Virginia for eight years while working for Nevada’s senior U.S. senator, Harry Reid.)

Porter, a former mayor and state senator from Boulder City, moved from that idyllic berg to nearby Henderson, so he could challenge U.S. Rep. Shelley Berkley for Congress in 2000. Alas, Berkley opened a can of whoop-ass on the Republican, beating him 51 percent to 44 percent.

But Porter was in the middle of his state senate term, and returned to Carson City for the 2001 session. There, he had a keen interest in the fact that the 2000 census had awarded Nevada a brand-new seat in Congress. And who draws district lines for new seats in Congress? The Legislature!

In fact, it’s not just their privilege, it’s their duty. Article 4, Section 5 of the Nevada Constitution reads thus: “It shall be the mandatory duty of the legislature at its first session after the taking of the decennial census of the United States in the year 1950, and after each subsequent decennial census, to fix by law the number of senators and assemblymen, and apportion them among the several counties of the state, or among legislative districts which may be established by law, according to the number of inhabitants in them, respectively.”

The only problem was, the Legislature failed miserably in its mandatory duty, and the 120-day session came to an end without a reapportionment map in place.

Why?

How about then-state senator Jon Porter? Yes, the same guy who’s attacking Tessa Hafen for only recently moving back to the state and the city of her youth, by calling her “another political opportunist Nevada can’t trust.”

See, Porter and his now-campaign manager, Mike Slanker were heavily involved in drawing the new district lines for the new seat, dubbed the 3rd Congressional District. And when the Legislature didn’t finish on time, then-Assembly Speaker Joe Dini pointed the finger squarely at Porter.

“Dini charged the entire reapportionment plan died [in the 2001 regular session] because Porter was unhappy over ‘8,500 Democrat voters’ in the proposed third congressional district, an open seat,” the Review-Journal reported at the time. “Porter and Republicans wanted even party registration figures in the district, while the Democrats’ final offer was a district where they hold a 8,500-voter advantage.”

The response? An angry denial perhaps? Labeling the Democratic speaker a partisan hack, or perhaps “another political opportunist Nevadans can’t trust”?

Nope. Porter admitted it, and sheepishly said he was just trying to get better numbers in the district for which he’d already declared himself a candidate.

“Porter called Dini a friend, but said it is unfair for Democrats to try to gain such an advantage,” the R-J story goes on to say.

“‘I cannot understand why they won’t support a fair district, one that is 50-50 and allows candidates to run on their own merits,’ he said. ‘People are tired of politics as usual. Why don’t they want to be fair?’”

Why don’t they want to be fair? Geez, Porter, because they want to win! Nobody in politics or war ever asked for a fair fight, unless they were crazy or breathtakingly ill-informed. (Besides, the truth is, Slanker drew the 3rd Congressional District to be almost even in registration knowing that Republicans “perform” better on Election Day, which is to say, they turn out and vote. A 50-50 district, therefore, is a Republican district. Hardly “fair.”)

So essentially Porter’s objections threw the entire process awry, and forced the Legislature into a special session to write the redistricting plan. And that makes us wonder: The constitution says “It shall be the mandatory duty of the legislature at its first session after the taking of the decennial census…” And the first session after the census was the 2001 regular session. Therefore, the special session was the second session of the Legislature after the census. Does that make the plan invalid? And does that mean Porter’s not really a congressman? And that all his votes have to be taken back?

Oh, it’s probably too late to change all that. Porter did defeat Dario Herrera fair and square in 2002, and then Tom Gallagher in 2004. (In fact, Porter resurrects poor Gallagher’s photo to bash him before moving on to bash Hafen, calling them “out-of-state liberals.” Geez, Porter, live in the now!)

Oh, it’s probably too late to change all that now. We may as well live with it. Today, the district is still closely divided, with 145,391 Democrats, 143,825 Republicans, and 53,900 non-partisans. Which is why it seems the race is so closely fought.

In addition to video clips that appear to depict Hafen as a mischievous pixie, Porter’s latest ad slams her for taking a stipend from her campaign. It’s a perfectly legal practice; in fact, she could draw a salary equal to the pay offered by the office for which she’s running, currently $155,100. (She’s taking much less than that, however, her campaign says.)

It’s not like Porter hasn’t taken some of his own campaign money, either, albeit not in salary. He’s paid himself $3,497 this cycle alone for things like office supplies, telephone charges, office equipment maintenance and meals, according to OpenSecrets.org, a website maintained by the Center for Responsive Politics. The site also shows expenditures to his daughter, Nicole Porter of Reno, in the amount of $747 for office supplies, postage and travel. And Porter’s estranged wife, Laurie, got $5,491 for things like — you guessed it — office supplies, travel and meals.

Geez, the Porter campaign goes through a lot of pens and pads of paper. They’re a Staples dream come true!

Anyway, the Hafen campaign shot back at the Porter ad with a news release calling Porter a “millionaire insurance salesman” and noting that he’s spent thousands on meals in restaurants in Washington, D.C., $10,000 on tickets to see U2 and $300,000 for Slanker’s services.

Wait, fancy restaurants? Cool concert seats? Three hundred large for consultants? Man, we think we got into the wrong business! We’re making peanuts toiling in our nondescript building in an industrial area near McCarran International Airport. Campaign consulting, that’s the ticket.

More info

You can download Porter’s ad from Vegas Pundit, the blog of my colleague Jon Ralston.

You can see Hafen’s response at her website.

You can find out more about Porter’s campaign at his website.