• That’s sure a relief. It turns out that state Treasurer Brian Krolicki dislikes illegal immigrants just as much as businesswoman/porn film equipment renter/porn hater Barbara Lee Woollen. As anyone with a TV knows, Woollen has made fighting illegal immigration her No. 1 priority, even though the Nevada lieutenant governor has as much to do with immigration issues as traditional Republican values do with … well, porn films.

But today, Krolicki made it official with a news release: He doesn’t like the immigrants much, either. Let’s join the statement, already in progress:

“Considering that illegal immigration is not under the purview of the lieutenant governor’s office, the issue has never been broached by anyone during this campaign.

“For the record, Brian Krolicki strongly supports fully securing our borders and continues to oppose the use of the Millennium Scholarship by unlawful residents.

“In 2003, Brian Krolicki attempted to include an area on the Millennium Scholarship award form that would have required potential scholars to declare their citizenship. Those who were unlawful residents would not have been able to utilize the scholarship.

“An opinion from the Nevada attorney general’s office in 2003 determined that the state treasurer is not permitted by statute to determine eligibility, and that the responsibility fell to the Board of Regents or the legislature.

“In August 2003, the Board of Regents declined to address the issue, referring it to the Legislature, and in 2005 Treasurer Krolicki included in Millennium Scholarship legislation a requirement for all Millennium Scholars to submit a FAFSA to the federal government.

“This would have required a valid Social Security number, and would have determined which students were ineligible. The Legislature refused to include this language in the version of the bill that passed.”

See, Barbara Lee Woollen! Krolicki worked very hard to deny state funds to high-achieving immigrant children, thus ensuring they couldn’t go to college on the dime of tobacco companies, from whose settlement money the Millennium Scholarship funds were pilfered in the first place! So don’t go around thinking you’re going to ride the hate parade into the lieutenant governor’s office, baby. Big K is right there with you, with a record that shows he’s done more in government to screw illegal immigrants than you ever have. So why don’t you just go back to making dirty pictures and let him go back to Carson City … which is pretty much the same thing.

Whew. Glad that debate is over. Now can we please get back to the real No. 1 issue in this race: Who looks better standing behind the rostrum in the Senate chambers, calling on Senate Majority Leader Bill Raggio to do the real work of the upper house?

• Our hearty congratulations to U.S. Sen. John Ensign for being named by The Hill newspaper as one of the 50 most beautiful people on Capitol Hill. (And our hearty thanks to the Las Vegas Gleaner for bringing this prestigious honor to our attention in today’s edition.)

The write-up for Ensign includes his “battle” with U.S. Sen. John Sununu, R-N.H., for the title of fastest man in the Senate. (Sununu’s secret? Like his dad, he uses government vehicles!) But the article was strangely silent on Ensign’s legislative accomplishments.

Anyway, we know Ensign is predisposed to reading the Bible, which is why we found it odd that he misquoted the Good Book. Sayeth Ensign: “There’s a Scripture that says gray hair is a sign of wisdom. I hope that’s true.”

It’s not, senator! We mean, it’s not true that there’s such a Scripture. Perhaps you’re thinking of Proverbs 16:31, which says, “Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained by a righteous life.” Or Proverbs 20:29, which says “The glory of young men is their strength, gray hair is the splendor of the old.”

Ouch. Ensign’s not that old. (He did miss making the Top 10 Most Beautiful People on Capitol Hill, however. The winners were all quite young.) And he’s still a star of many congressional athletic events, too.

So, keep your chin up, senator. Gray hair may be the splendor of the old, but you’ve still got a hell of a golf handicap. And ol’ Jack Carter, your Democratic challenger in November, sure isn’t going to be showing up on any most beautiful lists. He’ll be forced to beguile voters with his fancy “positions” on “issues” and “statements” on “policy” hammered out with his “reason” and “knowledge.” Who needs that when you’ve got (relative) youth and a freaking crown of splendor?

• You’ve got to fight. For your right. To smoke stuff! Or at the very least, the Nevada Resort Association does.