We at Various Things & Stuff are headed to the Deep South — Little Rock, Ark., to be specific. We’re attending the annual convention of the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies (AAN) where our beloved CityLife is applying for membership. If something totally blog-worthy happens, we’ll try to use our BlackBerry to post. But if not, we’ll see you back here Monday.

A few years ago, we at Various Things & Stuff took a trip to Washington, D.C. for a journalism convention. While there, we made a point to visit with each member of the Nevada delegation (save for U.S. Sen. John Ensign, who had an unexpected engagement back in Nevada). But before Ensign left, we attended the weekly breakfast he and U.S. Sen. Harry Reid host for visiting Nevadans in the Capitol. (We even got a photo, which we proudly display in our Henderson flat.)

Well, it seems the bipartisan breakfast buddy system doesn’t extend to the other side of the Capitol, where U.S. Reps. Jim Gibbons and Jon Porter were scheduled to hold a breakfast for their constituents at 8 a.m. today. “The breakfast provides an opportunity for Nevadans to meet with their members of Congress and provides a forum for discussion on many issues important to the great state of Nevada,” according to the announcement.

Gee, maybe we should go. Although we see and talk to Gibbons on the gubernatorial campaign trail, we hardly ever hear from Porter anymore. And we’d love to talk to him about some issues important to the state of Nevada.

But that’s not the point. Guess who was not invited to take part in the breakfast? None other than U.S. Rep. Shelley Berkley, who represents Las Vegas in the House of Representatives. Why she’s a fellow lawmaker who also has constituents who visit the Capitol. Why wasn’t she invited?

Oh, that’s right. Berkley’s a Democrat. And she doesn’t exactly get along with Gibbons (who she once called “a jerk”) and Porter (who she once called “a joke”). Guess they didn’t want her spoiling the bagels and orange juice bringing up things like Porter’s deciding vote against a military bonus, or Gibbons’ co-authorship of a report that downplays the dangers of mercury, or both men’s support of President George W. Bush’s tax-cuts-for-the-well-off/big-deficits-for-the-kids economic policy. Now that could make somebody choke on his Cheerios!

Don’t fret, Berkley. We’ll gladly have breakfast with you the very next time we hit Washington, D.C.

• Wow, how can we at Various Things & Stuff get a job at the Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority? They pay the mad coin, yo!

According to today’s Review-Journal, President Rossi Ralenkotter stands to pull down $317,714 next year. That’s the combination of a 5 percent raise, which brings his base salary to $248,714, as well as a $60,000 bonus and a $9,000 auto allowance. (At $750 per month, that’s a pretty sweet ride. We’d be thinking 911, but that’s just how we roll.)

The authority, of course, did a salary survey and found that level of pay to be just about right for Ralenkotter’s job, which includes luring tourists to Las Vegas and running the Las Vegas Convention Center.

Anyway, he listed his accomplishments as bringing a record 38.6 million visitors to town, 44 big trade shows and scoring the 2007 NBA All-Star Game for the Thomas & Mack. Oh, and there’s that big convention center expansion he’s planning, too. Always thinking ahead.

Man, luring tourists to Las Vegas. That must be really hard. Probably couldn’t find anybody to do that kind of work for what they’re paying. In fact, now that we think about it, we’ll pass on this gig. We don’t get off the couch for less than $500,000.

• So the Culinary Union Local 226 is circulating a petition in Reno that says anybody who wants to build a new casino outside the gambling district needs to get voter approval, and chip in a little something to Reno debt relief? The measure, which needs 11,661 valid signatures, has been dubbed the “Screw Station Casinos Hard and Raw Without the Benefit of Lubricant Act.”

Only kidding. The words “Hard and Raw” don’t appear in the actual text of the measure. We added that to make it funny.

But it’s really not funny, because Station is the only casino company planning to build in Reno. (It’s got two casinos on the drawing boards; one is next to the convention center and wouldn’t be affected by the initiative. The other is in South Reno and would definitely fall under the measure.)

Now we at Various Things & Stuff are vigorously pro-union. We think it would be very nice (and good business) for Station to allow the union to do a card check at the company’s Las Vegas properties. At least have a federally supervised election. But since we don’t have to answer to shareholders or board members, it’s easy for us to say that.

Even so, however, we have to take issue with the union’s description of the initiative. Let’s hear from Culinary Union Local 226 spokesman Chris Bohner, who was quoted in the R-J:

“Any casino built outside of Reno’s core gaming area is going to adversely impact the casinos in the city of Reno,” he said.

OK, so far we’re fine. That’s a legitimate debate, and one that the Reno City Council should address, via zoning and gaming enterprise districts, the way it’s done down here. Perhaps Bohner is right, and perhaps the city is justified in ordering that all new casinos be built near existing ones, to prevent downtown from becoming lame. (After all, that actually happened here in Las Vegas.)

But then Bohner just had to go and add this: “This petition is not about any specific property, It’s about protecting downtown Reno.”

This is, technically, bullshit. Since Station is the only company with a proposal to develop outside the core gambling zone, it is, of necessity, about Station. Moreover, if the Look for the Union Label Casino Corp. wanted to build a 100 percent labor-organized casino in South Reno, does anybody think we’d be seeing a petition like this? Hell, no.

We’ve no argument with the union advancing this petition. It’s well within its rights to do it, and, as we said, there’s a legitimate side to the debate. But don’t conceal your true motives and say you want to save downtown Reno. Tell it like it is: Station Casino refuses to be organized, so we’re taking them on wherever and whenever we can. (It’s one of the reasons that it makes good business sense to negotiate, although some might find that to be extortionate. We don’t, but whatever. Like we said, we don’t have Wall Street breathing down our necks.)

Anyway, the Great Battle of Reno is joined. We’ll keep an eye on it and let you know how its going. Hey, did you know they have a real-life river running through downtown Reno? No, we’re serious: It’s totally cool. People raft and stuff. The Truckee, we think it’s called. Very nice. Much better than the river of human urine that generally runs through the streets of our downtown. But that’s for another day.

• And finally today, a bit of courthouse corruption news, we at Various Things & Stuff have learned (when somebody e-mailed to tell us) that the Review-Journal plans to reprint, starting on Sunday, the recent Los Angeles Times series about judges with major conflicts of interest.

We’re glad to hear it, and not just because the ratio of readable content to ads in the Sunday paper is 0.437 to 1 million. Many Las Vegans didn’t see the Times series, and they should. So the R-J is doing a public service, and that’s a good thing. Props to them.

Now it’s time to start digging up these kinds of stories ourselves, and not waiting for bigger, better papers from outside Las Vegas to drop in and do them.

They’ve got good doctors at the Clark County Detention Center.

That’s our response to the news that Clark County Recorder Frances Deane is using a recent surgery to dodge showing up to be properly arrested for allegedly selling documents maintained by her office to private businessmen. Las Vegas Justice of the Peace Karen Bennett-Haron generously gave Deane until Friday to post a modest $20,000 bail or be arrested.

A mere $20,000? When Deane is accused of taking at least $44,000 and a $10,000 unreported campaign contribution? She shouldn’t have any trouble raising bail, should she? Good thing Bennett-Haron won’t be handling the felony trial Deane faces on 19 counts of wrongdoing.

Yes, we at Various Things & Stuff are rather hard-hearted when it comes to public corruption, especially with repeat violators like Deane. She conspired with others (including once and would-be future Lt. Gov. Lonnie Hammargren to start an Internet company to sell public documents online. The Ethics Commission extracted a $5,000 fine for a willful violation in 2004.

It was then that Deane decided to sell the documents to businessmen, and let them sell those documents to title companies. (Republican activist Monty Miller, who met Deane at a GOP fund-raiser, allegedly flipped documents he bought from Deane for $95,000.)

An eight-month Metro Police investigation turned up more buyers, who are cooperating with police. That means that Deane is sunk when this matter goes to trial, if she doesn’t strike a plea bargain first. Either way, thanks and kudos go out to the detectives of Metro’s Intelligence Section, Sheriff Bill Young and District Attorney David Roger for ridding county government of a corrupting cancer.

Oh, we mean allegedly, of course. Deane hasn’t been convicted of anything yet, and of course she’s innocent until proven guilty. Her earlier admission of wrongdoing before the Ethics Commission isn’t proof that she sold her office — cheap — to some unscrupulous businessmen. She deserves the presumption of innocence, no matter how galling and obscene her actions.

But when — oh, excuse us, we meant to say if — Deane is convicted, she should go to jail for a long, long time. We understand she just got out of the hospital, and has been playing up her illness. No problem.

They’ve got good doctors at the Clark County Detention Center.