After taking his sweet time, Carson City District Court Judge Bill Maddox has ruled that an initiative petition that would ban smoking most everywhere in Nevada can appear on the November ballot.

But, Maddox added a twist: He interpreted the petition to ban smoking in hotel and motel rooms, which even the authors of the risibly named Nevada Clean Indoor Air Act say they didn’t intend.

Why? Because they didn’t want to invoke the wrath of the casino industry. That’s why, although they claim to want to protect workers from the dangers of secondhand smoke, the petition still allows smoking on casino floors. The decision to abandon dealers, pit bosses, cocktail waitresses and security guards to death by secondhand smoke was a practical one.

But now, it looks like the gambling industry may be getting involved after all, since smokers are a key part of its business.

Let’s take a look at the reactions to the ruling, compiled by the Review-Journal.

“People want a smoke-free Nevada,” said Buffy Martin, a spokeswoman for the curiously named Nevada Tobacco Prevention Coalition. “They know how important it is for public health. Most people are looking for places to take their children where smoking is not allowed.”

Notice a couple things:

• “…a smoke-free Nevada.” Not smoke-free restaurants, or bars, or grocery stores, or convenience stores. No, they want a smoke free Nevada. Wethinks Buffy revealed a little too much with this quote. Because we all know the real goal of these healthy do-gooders is to ban smoking everywhere!

• “…take their children.” Oh, yes, we must do it for the children. Never mind that children are excluded from bars, casino gambling areas, and the areas in grocery stores where gambling is practiced currently. No, we must purify every single square foot of any place in Nevada where a child might even someday think about going! It’s for the children! Save the children!

Please. If you aren’t immediately suspicious of anybody who claims to be doing something “for the children,” you need a crash course in political human shielding. Readers, if parents don’t want their kids exposed to secondhand smoke, they should consider not taking them into places where people smoke!

But no. Instead, the non-smokers want to control the environment of any place where they put their sensitive noses, as evidenced by this paraphrase from the R-J story: “It would take time for smokers to get used to nonsmoking bars and restaurants, she [Martin] said, but once they did, they would find the ban beneficial for their health.”

The outrage is obvious: The tobacco prevention people are just trying to save smokers from themselves. You’ll get used to it! Your health will improve! Don’t thank us now, wait for later, when you’ll have increased lung capacity!

What a crock of shit.

Trust us: Smokers know that smoking isn’t healthy. They choose to do it anyway, and in our society, we have a thing called freedom of choice. And when some group tries to come in and deny that freedom of choice — because they know better what’s good for you than you do — it’s not only offensive, it’s a vicious assault on human, civil and unalienable rights.

On the other side, our friend Lee Haney of the Rogich Communications Group says a coalition of convenience store owners, slot route operators and others will try to explain the economic consequences of a near-total ban on smoking.

“We think there needs to be more restrictions on smoking, but we understand we live in a tourist-based economy that depends on things not acceptable in other states,” she said.

It’s a sound argument, and one that will surely capture the fancy of casino bosses and the people who work in casinos. But we’re not so sure the average citizen will care that a giant gambling company might lose out on money because smokers have to go outside to puff away (until the health nazis ban outdoor smoking, too).

We’ve always thought the best argument is the one that says people should be free to live as they wish, whether that means smoking, drinking, eating fatty foods and not wearing seatbelts, or the opposite of those things. And those people shouldn’t have their fellow citizens looking over their shoulder and telling them what to do.

If a smoker gets cancer and dies, that person is reaping the consequences of their actions, consequences that are well-known and well-publicized. But if freedom means anything, it includes the option to make even bad choices for oneself.

Don’t tell that to the tobacco prevention people, though. They want to make you healthy, if not by persuasion, then at the ballot box. And now they’ll have their chance.

But we’re hoping this is a different year, and that voters turn them back, either by voting no, or by voting no on the health nazi petition and yes on the alternative initiative circulated by Haney’s group, which would essentially ban smoking where children really do congregate (schools, arcades, etc.) but leave it legal in places reserved for adults.

Quotes of the Day

• “And he [the Beast] causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads: And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name.

“Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six.” — The Revelation of St. John the Divine, 13:16-18.

And, since today works out on the calendar to 6/6/06, some superstitious people are saying it’s the end of the world as we know it. (Actually, that’s just REM saying that.)

Don’t fret, readers! Jesus himself said nobody knows when the world will end, save for God. And what are the odds the world will end on a Tuesday? Friday, sure. Sunday, OK, that makes sense. But Tuesday? Not likely. So go about your business as usual, and, to shame the devil, be sure to perform at least one act of kindness for your fellow man today.

Now go and sin no more.

• “Soldiers, Sailors and Airmen of the Allied Expeditionary Force!

“You are about to embark upon the Great Crusade, toward which we have striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you. The hopes and prayers of liberty-loving people everywhere march with you. In company with our brave Allies and brothers-in-arms on other Fronts, you will bring about the destruction of the German war machine, the elimination of Nazi tyranny over the oppressed people of the Europe, and security for ourselves in a free world.

“Your task will not be an easy one. Your enemy is well trained, well equipped and battle-hardened. He will fight savagely.

“But this is the year 1944! Much has happened since the Nazi triumphs of 1940-41. The United Nations have inflicted upon the Germans great defeats, in open battle, man-to-man. Our air offensive has seriously reduced their strength in the air and their capacity to wage war on the ground. Our Home Fronts have given us an overwhelming superiority in weapons and munitions of war, and placed at our disposal great reserves of trained fighting men. The tide has turned! The free men of the world are marching together to Victory!

“I have full confidence in your courage, devotion to duty and skill in battle. We will accept nothing less than full Victory!

“Good Luck! And let us all beseech the blessing of Almighty God upon this great and noble undertaking.” — Gen. Dwight D. Eisenhower, June 6, 1944

With those Orders of the Day in hand, American fighting men launched Operation OVERLORD, the land invasion of Nazi-occupied Europe. Exactly 62 years ago today, on beaches named GOLD, JUNO, SWORD, UTAH and OMAHA, ordinary men struggled against German Field Marshal Erwin Rommel’s fearsome Atlantic Wall. They won that day a decisive victory, and began to turn the tide against the greatest tyranny the world has ever known. Thousands lost their lives in what is now known as the Battle of Normandy.

On May 7, 1945, after nearly a year of vicious fighting throughout Europe, Germany surrendered, ending conflict in the European Theater of Operations. On that day, Eisenhower was more brief, sending a one-line message to the War Office in London. It read:

“The mission of this Allied Force was fulfilled at 0241, local time, May 7th, 1945.”