That’s the sound of a Class-A catfight you hear brewing in Carson City, as Nevada’s first lady, Dema Guinn, takes aim at fellow Republican (and congressional hopeful) Dawn Gibbons, wife of would-be governor Jim Gibbons.

Dema Guinn says if Dawn Gibbons gets elected to Congress, she won’t be able to fulfill the duties of first lady, whatever those are. “Nevadans deserve to have a full-time congressperson represent them back in Washington, D.C., not a jet-lagged congressperson,” Dema Guinn was quoted as saying in the Reno Gazette-Journal.

Ouch, baby. Do you think the first lady knows that every Nevada member of Congress is jet-lagged, since most fly home on the weekends only to turn around and fly back out on Monday? Just ask U.S. Rep. Shelley Berkley how fun that schedule is.

“And the people of Nevada also need a full-time first lady,” Dema Guinn continued. If she gets elected to Congress, Dema Guinn added, Dawn Gibbons “could not run the [governor's] mansion from Washington, D.C.”

We’d suggest that the people of Nevada really don’t care who’s “running the mansion,” but we don’t want to be rude.

The backstory here, as always, is the real story: Jim Gibbons went before the Legislature in 2003 and slammed Gov. Kenny Guinn’s gross-receipts tax plan, a sin for which he hasn’t been forgiven by Nevada’s first family. Kenny Guinn has talked to several individuals about challenging Gibbons in the Republican primary for governor, and is mad as hell at his longtime counselor, Sig Rogich, who’s advising Gibbons on his bid. Now, Dema Guinn is getting into the act, and it looks like she’s got an even sharper knife collection than her husband.

But let’s be real, folks: Assuming Jim Gibbons becomes governor — and we’re not ready to say that’s going to happen yet — and Dawn Gibbons becomes a member of Congress, things in Nevada ought to work just fine. Sure, Dawn Gibbons won’t be around to do the things that first ladies traditionally do, but is that going to shut down the state? Or even be noticed by anybody? It seems to us that suggesting Dawn Gibbons would do a disservice to Nevada by not being first lady — and only first lady — is downright anti-feminist.

But, what the hell do we know? And, it’s a long way until both Jim and Dawn Gibbons face voters in their respective primary races. Until then, it seems, Nevada’s most prominent power couple is going to make life hard for the family Gibbons.

So the head of the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, Ken Tomlinson, has reached the end of his term. He sarcastically greeted the milestone, saying he could stand no more. (Remember this is the guy who hired outside contractors to determine if Bill Moyers was being too liberal.)

His replacement, alas, doesn’t look to be much better. Said Cheryl Halpern, upon taking the reins: “We have a duty to provide the public an explanation for the kind of work we do, and we must honor the principles clearly stated in our charter: to encourage objective and balanced programming.”

Sounds good, right? But what happens when an objective and balanced report would have to conclude that:

• The Bush administration’s response to Hurricane Katrina was woefully inadequate, and people died as a result?

• The Bush administration’s pursuit of tax cuts while at the same time spending billions on hurricane relief in the South and a war in Iraq is fiscally insane, and guaranteed to produce huge deficits that will have to be paid off by our children and grandchildren?

• The Bush administration deliberately leaked the name of a covert CIA operative to punish her husband for speaking out against a claim — made by the president in a speech to Congress and the American people — that was demonstrably false at the time he made it?

• The Bush administration went to war on premises that it knew, or should have known, were untrue? And that administration lies about the premises for war continue, almost to this very day?

• The Halliburton corporation, formerly headed by Vice President Dick Cheney, has received millions in no-bid contracts in Iraq and in hurricane relief efforts?

Do you think the Republicans who now head the Corporation for Public Broadcasting would object to any of those stories as unbalanced or not objective? Yet all are true. And must not “objectivity” yield to “truth” at some point? Or, put another way, isn’t telling these stories the pinnacle of “objectivity” itself, since they are all true?

Interesting points that will not be pondered at the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, another government enclave now tainted by Republican control of Washington, D.C. When will it end?

Oh, sorry, folks. We accidentally forgot our mission of being balanced and objective.

Hey, wait a second. That’s not our mission! Our mission is to tell the truth and shame the devil! So to hell with balance and objectivity! We at Various Things & Stuff will content ourselves with a crusade for enlightenment.

Poor Station Casinos. The neighborhood gambling giant just can’t seem to catch a break anywhere in Nevada. First, there was last year’s epic battle over the height of the Red Rock Station. Second, there was the controversy over shutting out critics from a meeting on the planned Station Casino on Durango Drive and the Las Vegas Beltway. And now, there’s the Reno angle.

Station has been working to develop a casino in south Reno, an area not exactly known for the growth of the gambling industry. (That’s thanks, in part, to an Indian casino in Auburn, Calif., that’s managed by Station Casinos and positioned on Interstate 80 to siphon gamblers who might otherwise drive all the way to Reno.)

But Station wants to build in depressed Reno, too, and has found a site for a 55,000-square-foot casino, 496-room hotel, spa, beach and pool area, not to mention nightclubs and restaurants, according to the Review-Journal. All in all, it adds up to something Reno hasn’t seen in a long time: New casino jobs.

Alas, critics have formed groups like Citizens Against Casinos in Neighborhoods and No South Reno Casinos campaign. And they’re lobbying against the project, which has yet to even go before the Reno City Council. (The land where the casino may ultimately be built is not even in city limits; Reno would have to annex the parcel eventually.)

Cynics at this point are searching for the invisible hand of the Culinary Union, Station’s mortal enemy. And there it is! The union is assisting in anti-casino efforts, seeing as how Station is a non-union casino and all.

But aligning with folks who say the new property will attract traffic (surely a good thing for a casino) and crime (an often-made, seldom-proven allegation) may come back to bite organized labor. If casinos cause crime, then shouldn’t they be banned? (Don’t worry, dear readers, the only crime that occurs in casinos is the voluntary, victimless fleecing of the masses, which is perfectly legal under state law.)

Alas, the union can’t deploy the better argument: Station has directly contributed to the decline of Reno thanks to its partnership in the California casino. After all, Station is committing to Reno’s market with a significant investment.

We at Various Things & Stuff have never really had a problem with neighborhood casinos. We frequent the Green Valley Ranch, which isn’t too far from our nondescript industrial building offices somewhere near McCarran International Airport. And we’ll probably drop by the new Red Rock Station when it’s finished, since we hear it’s going to be cool.

We do understand the concerns of people who don’t want casinos in neighborhoods, but look at the evidence: They are packed with customers. If people really didn’t like the locals gambling palaces, they’d be much more effective in voting with their feet and not visiting. Union or not, that simply doesn’t happen. Ergo, people like them, they make money, and they accrue the power and influence that goes along with money. And it will keep happening, so long as the masses keep stopping by.